We’ve all been there. You’re at a family dinner, a friend’s gathering, or even scrolling through social media when it happens – a political comment comes out of nowhere. Suddenly, the atmosphere changes. People start getting defensive, the voices get a little louder, and before you know it, that pleasant get-together feels like a tense courtroom. Sound familiar?
 
In today’s climate, political conversations are a minefield. Even a simple question or comment can escalate fast, leaving friendships strained, family members frustrated, and everyone wondering why they even started talking about it in the first place. Many of us leave these conversations feeling exhausted, angry, or just plain defeated. And honestly, who needs more stress?

1.Pause and Notice Emotions
Before diving in with your own viewpoint, take a moment to observe the emotions behind the other person’s words. Are they worried, frustrated, hopeful, or even scared? When you can identify the emotion in what they’re saying, it’s easier to see the human side, not just the opinions.

As the next U.S. Presidential election approaches, it seems like everyone has a strong opinion. Whether it's about policies, leaders, or the direction of the country, the conversations around politics can feel intense and often leave us divided. But here's the thing: division doesn’t have to be the end of the story. It’s possible to navigate political differences with respect, and even discover common ground—no matter how divided things seem.

In my book, Allied We Can Find Common Ground, I explore ways we can have difficult conversations in a healthy and productive way. It’s all about staying connected, even when we don’t agree. So, how can we apply these ideas to today’s political landscape? Let’s break it down.

1. Start With Listening, Not Arguing
It’s easy to jump into a conversation wanting to prove our point. But instead of going in with the goal of winning, try to listen. Ask the other person why they believe what they do and genuinely listen without interrupting. People are more likely to share their true thoughts when they feel heard. And believe it or not, sometimes we find common ground just by understanding where the other person is coming from.
 
2. Be Curious, Not Judgmental
We all have our reasons for thinking the way we do. Instead of dismissing someone else's opinion as "wrong," get curious. Ask yourself, "Why does this person think that?" You don’t have to agree with them, but when you approach a conversation with curiosity rather than judgment, it opens the door to more respectful dialogue. Plus, you might learn something new, even if you don’t change your mind.
 
3. Stay Focused on Shared Values
Even when we disagree on politics, we often share similar values, like wanting safety for our families, fairness in the workplace, or opportunities for future generations. During heated conversations, try to steer the discussion toward what you both care about. For example, if you and your friend disagree about a candidate, you might both agree that honesty and leadership matter. Build from there.
 
4. Avoid the "Blame Game"
It’s tempting to blame “the other side” for what’s wrong. But when we do that, we turn people into enemies. Instead, recognize that no one group or individual is responsible for everything. The truth is, most issues are complicated, and people are doing their best with the information they have. Acknowledging this can ease tension and keep the conversation respectful.

​So, as election day gets closer and conversations get tougher, remember that it’s possible to stay united, even with our differences. By listening, being curious, and focusing on shared values, we can navigate the political division in a way that brings us closer together. After all, we’re all in this together.